


Keep him sober

by Iamacarrot



Series: R&M fo lyfe! [4]
Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: I always rate this as mature because of the cursing, In his own Rick way, Protective Rick, Rick is gud, We need this, because babeh eyes don't need dis, i want this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-30 16:32:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13955577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iamacarrot/pseuds/Iamacarrot
Summary: Morty didn't mean to take as much of a sip as he did. Honest. He just wanted to knock the pain away... it always worked for his grandpa and his mom... so, why not for him too?





	Keep him sober

**Author's Note:**

> :3
> 
> Yaaaaaas betches.

Morty groaned as he fell onto his bed, a stolen bottle of vodka in his hand. His head was hurting like hell, and that was an understatement. A soft burp escaped Morty's mouth as he leaned onto his side, feeling as if he had to vomit, and imitating what he had seen Rick do on multiple occasions as to keep vomit from blocking his airway.

"Jesus Christ... Why did things have to mess up today?" Morty whined. Today was the day he REALLY needed to study up for a huge test the next day, and today had been absolute SHIT. First, his mother had completely shut him out when Summer came home with a broken heart. It was all 'You don't know her pain Morty!' 'You're just a guy! You'll never understand my feelings!'. Next, the adventure had gone awry, Morty's mistakes having earned him a one-way ticket to 'Make-fun-of-the-idiotville', his assaulter being none other than his grandfather, who showed no mercy, as he was already drunk out of his mind. Finally, he had learned that he was currently nominated as "Most likely to fail in life", for the school yearbook. Nobody denied voting for it, and nobody said that they voted against it either.

So, yeah, you get the gist of it. Complete shit.

More groans surfaced as Morty took another swig of alcohol, his senses numbed beyond comprehehnsion. Not that it all even mattered at the moment though.

No one would say anything as far as Morty was concerned, so what if he reeked of all sorts of alcohol? So what if he ended up like his mother or grandpa? So what if his family rejected him for this? It wouldn't be as different from anything else. So he drank on.

The drinking continued until he was out of the substance. Shit, he needed more, and the only place he could get more, was from Rick. He knew where his mom hid her wine, it was really no secret at this point, but he knew that wouldn't be strong enough for him, now that he'd started himself on the stronger liquids. He needed vodka, strong beer, liquor, Whiskey, anything to keep him numb. So, he made his way downstairs, somehow successfully managing to not stumble and/or fall more than he did when he was sober. His speech clear, and his mind still aware of the current events.

He needed something stronger. 

He needed more...

He needed to get to Rick, or, more specifically, Rick's hidden treasures. 

The boy had recently learned of the whereabouts of Rick's room full of the good stuff, and he knew all the passwords he needed to get to it too.

Morty hummed a soft tune to himself as he oh so gracefully snuck into Rick's vault of treasures. 

Things had gone so well, Rick was passed out on the couch, Summer was away with friends, and Beth was out shopping. Wow, it was amazing what one could accomplish when drunk. 

Well, if he managed to get this far when not NEARLY as drunk as Rick always was, he couldn't even begin to imagine what things would be like when he got to Rick's level... well... without dying from blood poisoning that is. As he grabbed his carefully selected choices, Morty turned to walk out and up, feeling that this had gone way too well for him. Sighing, Morty realized that his only bottle was wearing off quickly. Sneering, Morty quickly moved upstairs as quiet as possible, thankful that Rick was more than out of it, setting the bottles down in his room and rushing downstairs to make sure that Rick still had a pulse. 

He did.

Smiling, Morty walked back upstairs, closing his door and popping open the second bottle of the day.

~Three hours later~

Morty sat silently, two empty bottles, and one half empty bottle on the floor. Morty had lost all comprehension, and a puddle of green drool dripped down his chin slowly. God, he felt so empty. But good at the same time. Numb. Emotionless. Yet happy.

One more sip couldn't hurt, right? It's not like it even mattered, since no one would care anyways. So he went to grab the half empty bottle... and threw up on the floor.

Yep, that was karma coming to hit him like a bitch. If only it wasn't so harsh. Morty sat, thinking, praying that it didn't get worse, but karma showed no mercy to those who go beyond their dues. He deserved all that was coming for him. Especially what happened next.

"Hey M-Morty? Do you k-know who went into my, ugh, vodka stash? Some idiot went in and forgot to close the door. How, oh god, how stupid can a person be right?" Rick chuckled, still slightly drunk, but not as drunk as he could be, which meant that he had been thinking and making conclusions for the past three hours. La Dee Da.

Morty groaned, trying to stand and failing miserably. "Hey, Morty, you alright in there bud? I swear it smells like... like..." Rick trailed off, uttering a quick 'Shit!', before creating a portal and walking into Morty's room, the stench of vodka and vomit having become something he's been nose blind to for years now. 

"What the FUCK is wrong with you Morty?! This stuff is death in liquid form!" Rick screeched. "Then why do YOU, ugh, do it?" Morty slurred, swaying on his knees. Rick caught Morty before he could fall, picking the boy up and holding him bridal style. "Because, Morty, grandpa is an ignorant piece of shit who doesn't know how to deal with his problems. So he drinks to make them go away." Rick sighed. "So why can't I do that too?" Morty whined, huddling close to Rick and taking in the elder's scent. 

Rick thought about the question briefly before answering. "Because a little innocent child like you doesn't deserve to end up like your old grandpa. He's a bad role model, and he can't even take care of himself. Let alone you in this state." he admitted.

Morty whined again, pulling Rick's shirt close to his face. "I want to be you... but better... I wanna be, be your best favourite person guy." 

Rick chuckled softly, knowing full well that no one was truly aware what they said when they were drunk. "Well, Space Grandpa's Concerned Child is already my best favourite." Rick hummed. "Person guy?" Morty asked. "Person guy..." Rick cooed. Morty groaned, succumbing to his tired, drunken state. "You're gonna feel this in the morning sweetie. Let me tell you that." Rick sighed.

~The next morning~

Morty screamed as his head felt like it was being hit with a hammer, his hands rushing up to grip his head, but any movement making his pain worse.

"Told ya." Rick whispered, making sure to keep as quiet as possible, since he'd found out the hard way that it's not good to speak in a normal voice while you're suffering from a hangover.

"Riiiiiiiiick! It huuuuuuuurrrrts!" Morty cried, whimpering as Rick (who was currently sitting in a chair next to Morty's bed) stood, sitting next to Morty and pulling him close. "Does Concerned Child need some pain pills?" Rick asked, nuzzling against Morty's face gently. Morty nodded, his cheek rubbing against Rick's.

Rick smiled, placing a small kiss on Morty's forehead before standing to leave. "Nooooooo! Stay here! I don't wanna be alone!" Morty wailed. "Well, do you want me, or the pills?" Rick asked. "I love you." Morty hummed. "That's completely unrelated to my question." Rick sighed, walking back to Morty's bed. "Scoot, baby." Rick instructed, watching Morty do so. Rick climbed into the bed, grunting as Morty practically threw himself onto his grandpa.

"I'm you're sweetie, baby, person guy." Morty hummed happily, huh, he STILL remembered that? "You're my big old Space Grandpa, and I love my Space Grandpa." Morty continued on, hugging against Rick affectionately. Rick felt a blush appear on his face, thankfully though, Morty was too busy complimenting his grandfather to notice. "We're gonna go on some good times, you and me and you. We're gonna, gonna, sleep 'til we sleep... goodnight." Morty yipped before passing out on Rick's chest, smiling as he held Rick and got comfortable.

Rick smiled and sighed at the same time. Smiling, as he knew that he was good to assume that Morty had learned his lesson, and sighing in more frustration than anything else at knowing that he'd be lying in bed for hours... and man did he have to piss.


End file.
